With some time on my hands today, I headed to one of my favorite parks to read for a couple of hours. I started with "Half the Sky,"--a book recommended by a fell0w India-lover. I've been slowly working my way through this discussion of human trafficking and the massive injustices towards women in developing countries. As I was processing these stories of horrific oppression, beatings, abuse and rape, I switched to my second book: "Sacred Marriage." Tears came to my eyes as I realized that the expectation and goal of love and respect that I have of my coming marriage is a secondary point overseas. Many women would dream of just not being abused by their husband. I know in the US we don't have perfect marriages, but I live in a country where abuse isn't a socially acceptable practice in marriage (although I'm not naive about it's prevalence).
I was humbled when I realized (as I have countless times since I set foot in India for the first time) that to be educated at all, let alone to be a doctor is a privilege. "Half the Sky" talks a lot about how poor, uneducated girls are targeted--the more educated the girl, the more likely she is to know that it's possible to fight back. I remember the little girl, angry that she would be unable to move past 10th grade because then she would have to get married, and the 'lazy boys' got to continue their education. That encounter left me feeling so powerless and upset. And yet so unsettlingly grateful for the opportunities and value in which I was raised, and the loving and respectful man that I'm marrying. It's the tension that I hope to always live in.
