So.. after my first day of 8 weeks of pediatrics, I can say almost with certainty that pediatrics is not my passion. I like kids in real life. just not in the medical field. The commotion during the history, the crying when you're doing a physical exam, and not actually being able to talk with most of them... when it comes to medical stuff, I just think I like adults.
I found myself fascinated by the parents today:
The father who I immediately judged as I walked in the room by his loosely fitting pants perilously hanging from his hips, the long hair and the unsmiling demeanor. But as I watched him throughout the interview I was impressed with how loving a father he was. He seemed to always know what his nonverbal daughter needed~he suctioned her airways, he managed the feeding tubes and he lifted her weak body into his arms to hold her safely to himself. I saw his stressed and sick child crumple peacefully in the security of his arms.
Another mother came in with her 4 year old daughter. She was a single mom, frazzled, sleepless with dark rings around the eyes on her bare face. Her hair pulled back in the pony tail that tells the tale of a woman with no time for herself. She was harassed and short tempered and had unending exhaustion. I wanted to take her aside and know how she was doing. How she was holding up in the chaos of her life... And I wondered what happens when she lost her last straw of sanity...
I think I would be a pretty sucky pediatrician.
